More Feathers in my Empty Nest

In July 2008, Pretty Princess graduated from High School and moved from where we were living back to our home state. Pop and I thought we were experiencing an empty nest permanently at that time. I blogged about it then, as I sorted through my youngest's things. At that time, I never dreamed that our we would move back home where our girls' and their families live, and settle into a multi-generation home...full of life, noise, fun, and sometimes chaos. Happy, crazy chaos.

If you've been reading this blog for a while, you already know about our multi-generational family living arrangement for the past nearly two years. This past weekend, it came to an end...not in a dramatic, sad way - but in a happy, watching-to-see-what-God-will-do kind of way. EJ and Farm Chick are being blessed in a big way with the house they have just bought and moved in to. Bubba, Wubba, and Q are going to LOVE their new house and probably will grow up with very distant memories of living with Pop and Grammy. It's good stuff.

Two days ago, I quietly worked away doing things that would help facilitate the farmhands' move to their new home in the "city" while Q was getting a nap in his pack'n'play and everyone else was somewhere else. As I washed down the dining room table and chairs, I was reminded of all the meals we had shared - usually cooked by Farm Chick. I used a thumbnail to scrape off a little bit of brownie and thought about how much fun it has been to be a part of a daily ritual that many have discarded as old-fashioned...we call it dinner. I thought about all the laughs we have shared as we watched the boys antics and the events of each day were reviewed. What a privilege.

God gave us this precious time and my hope is that EJ and Farm Chick and the cowboys will have great memories of our "great adventure" at Four Sisters Farm together. EJ and Farm Chick, you have helped make our dream of a place for our family to gather come true. As I've read over old blog posts and realized all that has been accomplished here, I am reminded that we have much to be grateful for...you have contributed much. We choose to think upon good things, but we have weathered a few storms as we learned to make our living arrangement work. I pray that you will reap blessings and benefits from living at Four Sisters Farm and have wonderful memories that you will share and laugh about long after Pop and I are gone...now about the future...

We're looking forward to many more gatherings - with all the four sisters and their families - all at one time or one at a time - each gathering will be a blessing to us. I thank God for our Four Sisters Farm family and friends and while it will quieter than we're used to, Pop and I will enjoy each and every moment here...living the dream.

As I said the last time our nest became empty, "The house is more quiet than ever before...emptier than ever before...but my heart is more full than ever. Thank You, God!"

I am going to miss this.

It is starting to feel real.

The boxes are stacking up.

The moments of this season in our lives are flying by all too fast now.

It has been nearly three years of living at the Four Sisters Farm and nearly two years of living here with Pop and Grammy.

My head knows that I am only moving fifteen minutes away.

My head knows that I am the one who initiated this move.

My head knows that we need to have more room to welcome the children who are coming.

My head knows that this is a good thing.

But my heart just doesn't get it.

My heart, that stinkin' heart.  It loves so big and it feels way too much.

I am going to miss this.

I will miss cooking for everyone.

I will miss coffee chats with Mom.

I will miss watching my boys scurry to the back door to greet Pop and Grammy.

I will miss stolen moments with my Dad when it was just us even in a house with this many people.

I will miss Buzz Lightyear pancake mornings.

I will miss walking to the pond when I need a little time to myself.

I will miss the front porch.

I will miss being in the middle of all the action.

I will miss lingering after dinner with EJ, Pop and Grammy while we solve the world's problems or maybe just laugh our heads off about something that happened that day.

I have to remind myself that Pop and Grammy will still be here. 

The farm will still be here.

I can come out anytime I need to.

I can drop off my boys so they can soak up special time with Pop and Grammy.

I am not losing them.

It is time for the next chapter and I know good things await for all of us.

That doesn't mean there won't be tears.  Change is hard but God is good.

Pop, Grammy, and EJ,
I love you each so much.  Thank you for this adventure.  I am proud to have been a part of it.
Love always,
Farm Chick

The one about the house

I cannot explain how this happened.  It just did.  The night I knew the twins were gone it came over me so strong.  I looked at EJ and said, "It's time.  Buy me a house."

You see we have been on the Four Sisters Farm adventure for almost 3 years now.  The first year we were here by ourselves and then God blessed us by bringing Pop and Grammy here for the past two years. 

The plan was for us to live in a multi-generational home for a couple more years until we were ready to build a place on EJ's family land.  With the housing market so low we can buy a heck of a house for much less than what we can build it.

The timing seemed a little crazy to those around me.  Everyone wanted to be sure that I wasn't acting out of grief.  I asked that everyone would give me grace if I freaked out and changed my mind in a week.  EJ contacted our realtor but told her that he wasn't sure if I would be able to go through with it.

But the feeling didn't go away.  It got stronger.  I felt like we needed to get in position to receive the blessing of more children.  (a strange emotion when you have just lost two)

At the time there was literally NOTHING right for us on the market.  I kept checking realtor.com to see if just the right place would appear.  I figured God was going to make the process take a long time so we could all come to grips with this big change.  I was perfectly okay with that.

You see, I have loved being here.  This place is special.  The land is beautiful.  The pond is peaceful.  The home is warm.  My folks are here.  My family comes here often.

Don't get me wrong.  Multi-generational living has its challenges.  But the benefits have certainly outweighed the challenges and the time together has been so sweet.   

Two weeks into our search we found what we thought was just the right house.  It was in distressed condition but we were looking forward to restoring it.  It was going to be over 5,000 square feet when it was completed.  It had so much potential.  Long story short...the deal fell apart.

We were so sad but knew that God must have something else for us.  Again I checked online for more homes.  I was sure this was going to take forever.  When were we going to find another home that size for a decent price?  What a bummer.

Then I found it.

I had heard that this home would be going on the market but I had no idea how BEAUTIFUL it was.

EJ was out of state on business when the house came on the market.  I e-mailed him the link to the house.  He encouraged me to go see it.  I wasn't sure I wanted to do that without him.  I took Grammy and the boys and we checked the place out. 

I LOVED IT.

It has a very open floor plan.  I can have those big family gatherings I love to host.  Not to mention the size of the bedrooms, the wood floors, the vaulted ceiling, the sun room, the huge family room, the fireplaces, the built in book shelves, the storage space, etc.

So I told EJ all about it.  He encouraged me to go ahead an make an offer.  We knew what we were looking for.  This home has over 5,000 square feet and it is move in ready.  All I need to do is buy some furniture to fill it.

We literally bought this house while EJ was in another state! 

He just went with me to see it this morning and sign the paperwork. 

What an exciting time!

This is one of the pictures from the listing.  It just makes me happy...

(The sign says, "Christ is the head of this house.  He is the unseen guest in every room.")

You want to know something special?  Not only is there a heritage of faith in this home, there is also a heritage of adoption.  This home has always been owned by an adoptive family.

What does God have planned for us in this next chapter?

I believe He is bringing more children. 

This house will be ready to give them shelter and a place to call home.  Bring them home, Lord, in your perfect timing.  We are here with open arms.

Handy Grammy Strikes Again!

When I was super pregnant with Wubba, Bubba got the flu.  Then our washer pooped out on us.  So, like any crazy hormonal woman would do, I grabbed my husband and marched right to the store.

Mommy, Bubba and Wubba (in the tummy) 2007

We purchased a top of the line front load washer and dryer.  We spent a small fortune.  I didn't care.  I was about to give birth and my toddler was puking on everything.  I was desperate.

At first I was in love.  It worked like a charm.  Then just a few months into our ownership it started to show it's ugly side.  Luckily we had purchased a one year service agreement so the repairs were covered for that year.  We have had a lot of service calls that we paid out of pocket for since then.

As you know, Grammy saved the day by learning how to clean out the pump trap.  She has saved me LOTS of money with that little fix.  (We have to do it every few months at least)

Well, last night, EJ and I were enjoying yet another episode of Burn Notice, when we heard what sounded like a power tool hard at work.  At first we thought Pop and Grammy were working on a project downstairs.  That seemed strange.  It was late at night, the cowboys were sleeping and last thing we knew Pop and Grammy were watching TV downstairs.

We jumped up to investigate only to find it was our washing machine.  It was making some seriously crazy noises.  Oh goody.  Another repair man call. 

This morning I called for an appointment.  I set it up for Monday.  I was informed that the labor rate would be $129 + parts or I could pay a cool $344 for a year long maintenance agreement.

When Grammy came up this morning for coffee, I told her my washing machine tale.  I ranted about how much money this jewel of a washer had cost for the past 3 1/2 years.  Then I told her I was going to buy a top loader and be done with it.

Handy Grammy got that look in her eye.  I know the look.  It's the one that says, "I bet we can fix this."  Next thing I knew she was searching on the Internet for ways to fix my model of washing machine.  After some research she headed confidently to the washer, pulled back the rubber seal and dislodged one of EJ's dress socks from between the washer's drums.

I have run two loads since and all is well in washing machine land.

Handy Grammy, you rock my socks off!  Or maybe EJ's.

P.S. Can I just add that this is one more blessing of multi-generational living.  You benefit from the skills of 4 grown ups. :)

Our Multi-Generational Home

Four Sisters Farm started out with just us Farm Hands.  When Pop and Grammy moved back to the state we became a multi-generational home.  Certainly there are challenges when you combine two family units under one roof.  We have had our share of them but overall this little experiment has turned out to be a major blessing.

If all goes according to plan, EJ and I will build a home in a few years.  Grammy and I get a little teary when we discuss it.  It will be tough to leave this place.  However, there will come a time when we will outgrow our floor and Pop and Grammy will be ready to remodel. 

For now, I will enjoy it.

I am going to start documenting some of the moments that bless my heart.

Recently, I planned a night away for EJ and I to celebrate his birthday.  I asked Pop and Grammy to keep the cowboys for us.

This is the note I left them... 

You mommas will understand this.  When you leave your children for the night the list is usually much longer.  It must include a much more detailed account of what each little person needs, likes and dislikes.  It involves schedules and feeding instructions and diaper directions.

I got to leave without giving instructions on any of this.  Pop and Grammy just know it. 

The Race

As you know, we live with Grammy and Pop. When you enter our home you have two options... go downstairs to their place or upstairs to ours. Both doors have locks on them. My boys have a new game. It's called "race Mommy up the stairs and then lock her out." The lock is tricky and they can get it to lock but can't manage to unlock it. (and they don't really want to anyway) So there I am...stuck. On the other side of the door are two pre-schoolers laughing victoriously. Lucky for me Grammy saves the day and brings me her key so I can get into my own house. It was funny...the first time.